Following the departure of Claudio Ranieri from Watford, making him the twentieth manager sacked by the club in the past two years, former England boss Roy Hodgson is set to be his replacement in the coming days.
And he’ll become the first manager in Premier League history to sign a contract with its tenure based on matches in charge as opposed to a yearly contractual commitment.
The club are said to be keen to avoid a long-term agreement with any new gaffer given how they’ll probably want to sack them in six weeks time and bring in some bloke from Spain you never heard of.
And former England, Palace, Liverpool and Fulham boss Hodgson is delighted to meet those very specific demands.
Speaking to a local news reporter, Hodgson is understood to be “pleased as punch” with the agreement guaranteeing him short-term work over February and March ahead of a lot of social activity scheduled for spring onwards.
“The Watford owner called me on my landline as I don’t know how to use a mobile phone thingy. I was watching Murder, She Wrote when he called.
“To pick up work in the current climate is fantastic for me as it gives me a bit of pocket money to spend down Homebase, a store I like to walk around really, really slowly every Sunday morning” he said gleefully.
“Nine matches will be the absolute limit and leads me nicely into April, which is when the bowls season kicks off and a whole variety of coach tours are announced for seniors in my area.
“This year the wife and I will book trips to Eastbourne, Hastings, Whitby, and Blackpool. We cannot wait to explore the seaside towns.
“Obviously taking the Watford role means I will not be able to do my weekly shopping at 8am on a Tuesday morning which I do religiously, or queue up outside of the local pharmacy to collect my Cod Liver Oil tablets, but heck, it’s only nine matches so I will be back in my routine before you know it.”
With the arrival of Hodgson imminent, Paddy Power News managed to grab a few words with a Watford supporter.
“We love Roy, he’s already been down here handing out Werther’s Originals to the local children.
“We were going to join him for a game of Cribb but he had to get to the Harvester for dinner as his senior discount only applies before 5pm.”
*Paddy Power’s breaking news coverage is 100% fake news, and that’s the truth – honest*
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