The San Marino Football Federation are arranging a friendly against Sheffield United after losing 3-1 to Saint Kitts and Nevis.
San Marino missed a chance to end their 20-year drought without a win against the Caribbean side who are ranked 63 places above them in FIFA’s standings.
SAN MARINO, ITALY – MARCH 20: Raheem Somersall of St. Kitts and Nevis crosses the ball as Michele Cevoli of San Marino closes in during the International Friendly match between San Marino and Sinatv Kitts and Nevis at San Marino Stadium on March 20, 2024 in San Marino, Italy. (Photo by Jonathan Moscrop/Getty Images)
In a desperate bid to boost-morale amongst their beleaguered players, San Marino chiefs are hastily organising a friendly game with the Premier League’s bottom club.
‘We’ve lost to some sh*te teams these past 20 years. Liechtenstein, the Seychelles, Scotland. But without question Sheffield United represents our best chance of victory’, San Marino President and team bus driver Marco Tura told Paddy Power News.
‘The lads are expecting a bit of a cricket score, to be honest’.
Tura rejected claims the San Marino players would learn nothing from pulverising an inferior side like Sheffield United.
‘They might not be on the same level as your Saint Kitts and Nevis’s or Cape Verdes of this world but a big win against Sheffield United would give our lads a bit of much-needed confidence’.
‘You never know? We could go on a bit of a run and only lose 20 games on the trot’.
When asked what the San Marino Federation’s next move would be should the unthinkable happen and they lose against the Blades, Tura snapped:
‘If we can’t beat that bad lot, then I’ll organise a friendly against someone like Sofa Land or Love Island’.
‘F*ck it. I’ll give Derby County a call. See if we can organise a friendly against their 2008 side’.
‘Surely, we’d beat them. I mean some of those Derby players would be in their 50s by now’.
However, Sheffield United have rejected the opportunity to face San Marino after consulting with Blades boss Chris Wilder.
Paddy Power News understands Wilder refused to play the European minnows after receiving reports that San Marino’s national dish is a sandwich.
*Paddy Power’s football coverage is pure fantasy – don’t believe it for a second.
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