Following the news that Ben White has made himself unavailable for international selection for the upcoming England fixtures, assistant manager Steve Holland is understood to have been left absolutely livid with the player. An onlooker confirmed Holland screamed “what would Winston Churchill make of all this?”, before ripping off his shirt to reveal a British Bulldog tattoo and storming out of St George’s Park.
Despite Gareth Southgate’s thoughtful and diplomatic response when questioned by reporters over White’s stance, Paddy Power News understands everybody inside the FA cannot comprehend why their fifth choice right-back has decided to pass up the opportunity to spend the best part of a week as an unused substitute in two meaningless matches.
Rumours claiming the Arsenal defender was asked to wash Phil Foden’s car, do a Starbucks run for Harry Kane and cut up oranges for half-time refreshments during his last international call up were quickly put to bed by the England PR team who had this to say during a media day.
“Inclusivity and respect are paramount for us. We’d never undermine a professional in that way. During his last outing with us, everything asked of White was completely related to football and we made him feel part of the group,” said the PR delegate.
“For instance, he was awarded the title of head of cones, which required him to put out the cones ahead of each training session.
“He was also tasked with handing out the bibs during 5-a-side, ensuring every player got one which we all know is a super important job.
“The door remains open should he change his mind,” concluded the delegate.
While many feel White is in the wrong for turning his back on his country, one former England international has offered some very questionable advice.
“When you’re watching everyone else get picked ahead of you it can be tough, so you need to create a ghastly plan to put yourself on the map.
“Maybe Ben could put laxative in the morning coffee of his teammates on matchday morning? For me, I stole a goal from Jermaine Defoe and I don’t regret a single part of it as I have a 100% goalscoring record for England” said a gleeful David Nugent.
With the likes of Trent Alexander-Arnold, Kieran Trippier, Kyle Walker, Reece James, Gary Neville, Paul Parker, and Lee Dixon all above White in the pecking order for that right-back position, a reconciliation is not expected any time soon, so the focus for the in-form Arsenal defender remains Premier League and Champions League success, which we expect will be over by mid-April.
*Paddy Power’s football coverage is pure fantasy – don’t believe it for a second.
READ MORE
- Arsenal land 10-2 aggregate Bayern defeat in Champions League quarter-final draw
- Shoot on over to Paddy Power News for the best Football Betting Tips & News
- Transfer News – Harry Kane seeking Celtic move after Bayern title race defeat
- Reports: Gary Neville to be surprise guest during Usher Super Bowl half time show
- Reports: Van Dijk & Alisson tipped for Strictly after Arsenal mix-up
THE PADDY POWER GUIDE TO SAFER GAMBLING – EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW
