Cristiano Ronaldo stormed out of Manchester United’s Carrington training base this morning after he was told first-team players would be helping with the Old Trafford paint job.
Images circulating on social media yesterday showed what appeared to be contractors painting sections of the Sir Alex Ferguson Stand.
However, Paddy Power News understands the two men inside the cherry picker were in fact forgotten stars Donny van de Beek and Aaron Wan-Bissaka.
And when Ronaldo arrived for training this morning, he was informed by United’s coaching staff he would be painting the club’s antiquated stadium instead.
‘The Glazer family are fulfilling their pledge of a stadium revamp by slapping some red paint on the rust and bird sh*te’, a United source told us.
‘When Ronnie reported to Carrington, he was surprised to find overalls hanging on his peg instead of a training kit’.
‘After confronting Erik Ten Hag and Steve McClaren, Ronnie was told to report to Old Trafford to give the Sir Alex Ferguson Stand a second coat’.
BERGAMO, ITALY – NOVEMBER 02: Cristiano Ronaldo of Manchester United looks on during the UEFA Champions League group F match between Atalanta and Manchester United at Stadio di Bergamo on November 02, 2021 in Bergamo, Italy. (Photo by Emilio Andreoli/Getty Images)
‘Ronnie was furious, but the final straw came when McFred pulled up in a white transit van to take him to the ground’.
‘He threw his overalls at Ten Hag and stormed off’.
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The United boss confirmed the Portuguese had refused to paint the stadium and said the matter would be dealt with internally.
‘Someone of Cristiano’s experience should know a second coat defines the whole job’, the Dutchman told Paddy Power News.
‘Should we have supplied him something bigger than a 6-inch roller? Perhaps. But there is a budget we must work within’.
‘I’m sure McFred will come in and do a decent job. Not the required level for this club but decent’.
Meanwhile, United have confirmed Director of Football John Murtough has flown out to Mars for talks with Elon Musk about a prospective takeover bid for the ailing giants.
Billionaire Musk, currently enjoying a 2-week vacation on the Hellas basin region of the red planet, got United fans excited yesterday when he tweeted about buying the club.
However, shortly after Murtough’s space shuttle exited the Earth’s atmosphere, Musk backtracked claiming it was all just ‘banter’.
‘Not wasting my money on that sh*te, mate’, laughed the world’s richest man.
‘Besides, everyone knows I have my heart set on Stoke’.
*Paddy Power’s breaking sports coverage is 100% fake news*
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