According to sources at Tottenham, Harry Kane is preparing to go on strike once he returns from international duty having seen the club’s mooted third kit for next season
The wantaway 27-year-old forward, who is currently limping through the Euros, is said to have gone from hopeful to “absolutely f*cking livid” in the space of 48 hours, following a rejected transfer bid from Man City.
The fact he will now have to dress like an Elton John tribute act whilst still playing for Spurs next season is said to be the final straw in his relationship with the London club.
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“He was screaming down the phone at Ryan Mason, telling him he will sue the club if they make him wear such an outrageously sh*t shirt,” the source told us, stating that the striker is under the impression Daniel Levy has done this to spite him for wanting to leave.
“He said if it’s not bad enough playing with the likes of Harry Winks and Erik Lamela every week, he now has to do so dressed like Lady Gaga crossed with a mint Aero!
Just when you think Spurs can't be humiliated any further, you find out that this is apparently their third kit for 2021/22 pic.twitter.com/pFN4gqA44H
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“Naturally, after a few minutes of shouting, Ryan just started crying and hung-up the phone.
“Nobody has seen him since, but Ryan’s mum has informed us that he’s been spending a lot of time in his bedroom listening to One Direction, dreaming about what life would have been like if he had pursued a career in a boyband instead of football.”
Kane’s representatives had this to say on the matter:
“Harry is a model professional, but certainly not a model. Clothing like that deserves to be on a catwalk in Milan, on a dancing podium at Coachella, or on top of a bonfire – but it has no place on a football pitch.
“Do you think it is a coincidence that since Kane saw this shirt, he has lost the ability to control a football?
“The vision of this shirt haunts him. It’s on his mind 24/7.”
Harry’s been ridiculed enough over the years just for being at Spurs. He doesn’t deserve any more pain and, quite frankly, that shirt is a visual representation of pain, stench, anguish, heartache, headache, toothache and a multi-car pile-up.”
With England qualifying as winners of Group D and set to lose to Germany or France on Tuesday, Kane is said to be eager to return to club duty on Wednesday where a decision on his future will be made.
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