Shark pulls out of Mike Tyson fight over fears of being bitten

A very sensible shark.

A Great White shark scheduled to fight Mike Tyson has sensationally pulled out at the last minute over fears the former heavyweight champion could bite him.
The extraordinary match-up pitted one of the most ferocious predators on the planet against a shark.

The contest dubbed ‘Tyson vs Jaws: Rumble on the Reef’ was due to be screened by the Discovery Channel Box Office on 9th August. However, it would appear the shark got cold fins after watching some archive footage of Tyson’s encounter with Evander Holyfield during which he bit off a chunk of his opponent’s ear.


Explaining his decision to quit, the shark told us: “After a lot of thought, I’ve decided to pull out of the fight with Mike Tyson. I don’t believe the match officials can guarantee my safety in the ring and for that reason, I’m out.

“I made the decision after speaking to my family who were concerned for my wellbeing having witnessed Mr Tyson’s behaviour during previous fights. I apologise to all my fans throughout the ocean and hope they understand my reasons.”

The news will come as a bitter disappointment to boxing fans around the globe who were eagerly anticipating the under-water bout. Many commentators felt the shark stood a chance against Tyson despite the odds being firmly stacked against the fish.

The shark’s impressive career record of having devoured 18 surfers and 6 scuba divers gave punters cause for optimism. However, his decision to pull out leaves Mike Tyson without an opponent for his hotly anticipated comeback.

Since the announcement Tyson has been trying to find a replacement but with zero success thus far. It’s rumoured Chuck Norris, Darth Vader and the Indoraptor from Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom have all refused to face The Baddest Man on the Planet in the ring.

Calling out the Indoraptor, Tyson said: “I’m the mosth brutal and victhiousth, the mosth ruthleth man there hasth ever been and I’m gonna make the Indoraptor my bitthe.”

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