FFP chiefs threaten Man City with naughty step if they sign Grealish & Kane ​

And you can stay there until we say you can leave...

Pep Guardiola Manchester City

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Manchester City face a time-out on the naughty step if their £250m double-swoop for Jack Grealish and Harry Kane breaches any Financial Fair Play regulations, Paddy Power News understands.

The game’s governing bodies are set to push for the stiffest of penalties should the Manchester club be found guilty of extracting the urine out of FFP rules.

“Today, an investigation has been launched into Manchester City’s £250 million pursuit of Jack Grealish and Harry Kane,” read a statement.

“Our investigators are trying to establish whether the income generated through the sale of three season tickets is enough to offset the quarter-billion pounds outlay on these two players.

HarryKaneEnglandSep20

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“Should it emerge City have engaged in any financial irregularities, then they can expect a period of self-reflection on a step reserved for naughty boys and girls.”

A source close to the top of the European game has warned Man City of the consequences should they be found in breach of the rules.

“We’ll be confiscating the owner’s iPad and placing him on the naughty step for a full five minutes – and not a second less,” the insider told Paddy Power News.

“We tried fining them but they paid the last one with spare change found down the back of the sofa.”

Jack Grealish Aston Villa Sheffield United Premier League September 21, 2020

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Discussing the naughty step technique as a suitable punishment, the source added: “I was binge-watching Supernanny the other night and she had tremendous success with it.

“It was particularly effective on children who persistently flouted the rules. It also allowed the child a moment to think about what they’d done.”

In related news, Pep Guardiola has been offered several roles in upcoming Hollywood movies following his tearful end-of-season performance during which he convinced everyone City were skint.

“It was a real tearjerker. On a par with Sophie’s Choice, Steel Magnolias or Matt Hancock on Good Morning Britain,” a review read.

**Paddy Power’s breaking news coverage is proudly 100% genuine fake news – if you believe this actually happened, we’ve some magic beans to sell you…**

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