Following weeks of rumours linking Gareth Southgate with a move to Manchester United, the England boss has finally ruled himself out of the Old Trafford job, describing the club’s unwillingness to sign Jordan Henderson as “confusing and saddening”.
Southgate, who is not only the England manager but CEO and founder of the Jordan Henderson Appreciation Society, is said to have at one point been “incredibly keen” on a move to Manchester, but only on the agreement he could make his own signings; something United’s new owners INEOS will not allow.
“Gareth had it all planned out. He was going to recruit Kalvin Phillips and Eric Dier as well as make an audacious attempt to bring Jesse Lingard back to the club” confirmed a source from within the FA.
“His first matter of business was to reappoint Harry Maguire as club captain, and from there surround himself with all the lads he’s trusted over the past 20 years, like a bit of a jolly boys outing of England heroes who peaked in 2021. He had Jordan Pickford and Raheem Sterling lined up too.
“Unfortunately for him, his whole concept of success at United hindered on Henderson being the focal point, so without that, the deal is off and Henderson can continue his admirable work of growing the game in Holland” continued the source.
Paddy Power News contacted Jordan Henderson’s PR team for comment on the situation.
“Jordan is proud to have introduced football to the Saudi Arabian people and is delighted to have continued his pilgrimage by taking football to the heart of Holland.
“It doesn’t stop there for him either as he feels he owes it to humanity to teach them about the beautiful game.
“He wants to visit every corner of the world, where he plans to spend time in Germany, Argentina, Brazil, Ivory Coast, Senegal, Spain, and France, teaching them all there is to know about football.”
Other news coming from the England camp is that Manchester City boss Pep Guardiola is considering his options after two of his stars returned crocked from international duty.
With both Kyle Walker and John Stones picking up knocks whilst away, Pep is believed to be exploring the idea of bringing Arsenal’s Ben White in to deliver a motivational talk to his players, on how you can say “up yours” to your country and get away with it scot-free.
*Paddy Power’s football coverage is pure fantasy – don’t believe it for a second.
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