Breaking News: Bruno Fernandes set to star in Scream 5 ​

Thursday was fright night for Bruno

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Manchester United star Bruno Fernandes is set to appear in the fifth offering of the slasher series Scream, according to Rotten Tomatoes.

The 26-year-old will star alongside Courtney Cox, David Arquette and Neve Campbell and many more of the franchise’s original actors.

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It’s understood movie producers approached the Portuguese international following his critically-acclaimed performance during United’s 4-2 defeat against Liverpool last night.

Radio Silence, the group making the film, told the Paddy Power News:

‘Bruno’s screams at Old Trafford last night were on a par with Janet Leigh in Psycho or Shelley Duvall in The Shining’.

Manchester United’s Brazilian midfielder Fred (3rd-R) calls the referee as Manchester United’s Portuguese midfielder Bruno Fernandes lies on the lawn during the English FA Cup fifth round football match between Derby County and Manchester United at Pride Park Stadium in Derby, central England on March 5, 2020. (Photo by Oli SCARFF / AFP) / RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE. No use with unauthorized audio, video, data, fixture lists, club/league logos or ‘live’ services. Online in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No video emulation. Social media in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No use in betting publications, games or single club/league/player publications. / (Photo by OLI SCARFF/AFP via Getty Images)

‘Those bone-chilling shrieks picked up by the pitch-side microphones reminded us of Drew Barrymore’s howl in the original Scream’.

‘Bruno was so overcome with emotion when we asked him to be in the movie that he dropped to the ground and rolled around yelling with joy’.

Meanwhile, sh*t-footballer turned sh*t-actor Vinnie Jones believes Fernandes has what it takes to be a success in Hollywood.

‘One minute he’s writhing around the floor like he’s trodden on a bear trap and the next he’s sprinting into the box like Usain Bolt to get on the end of a cross.

‘It’s Oscar-worthy’.

‘If he keeps honing his craft and lands the right roles, he could end up making a lot of shit direct-to-DVD films like me and Stan Collymore’.

However, one person not so keen on the Portuguese’s foray into the film industry is Manchester United boss Ole Gunnar Solskjaer.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer

‘If Bruno insists on making this movie then he won’t be getting his tea tonight’, the Norwegian told IMDb.

‘No one goes to the cinema anymore, do they? Netflix is where it’s at. Have you seen Lilyhammer? Great show. Lots of Norwegian humour. Can’t believe they only made 3 seasons’.

In other news, the Pundits Union have confirmed that any spectacular goals scored as of next season will be renamed ‘a Bruno’ as opposed to ‘a screamer’.

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