Solskjaer’s pre-match team talk revealed: ‘Pretend we’re 2-0 down away from home’ ​​

If this doesn’t work, nothing will.

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Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has revealed what he’ll say to his Manchester United players before tonight’s derby clash with Manchester City. The Old Trafford outfit have gone behind in eight out of 10 Premier League matches this season, which Solskjaer maintains is part of a long-term strategy to prematurely age their supporters.

Discussing his pre-match team talk with Paddy Power News, the Norwegian said: “During the first half of our games this season, the boys have played like a hungover Sunday League team. Actually, I take that back, that’s an insult to Sunday League teams”.

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Read: Football tips: Goals at a premium in this 28/1 Man Utd v Man City Same Game Multi

“Then in the second half, once we’ve lured the opposition into a false sense of security, we’ve produced a Roy of the Rovers-style comeback to snatch an undeserved three points. As much as we enjoy putting our fans through the wringer like that, I thought we’d spare them the indignity of soiling themselves tonight.

“I told them to pretend they’re playing anywhere in the world but Old Trafford and trailing 2-0 at the break. In doing so, I’m hoping the lads will skip straight to the segment of the game when they knock the ball around like the 1970 Brazil team and score three goals in 15-minutes”.

Solskjaer confirmed that United will start the game with five strikers on the pitch with skipper Harry Maguire joining the attack whenever possible.

We’ll throw the kitchen sink at them in the opening 15.

“I’ll start the game with a 2-2-6 formation using Harry as a makeshift centre forward. Once we’ve got our three-goal cushion, I’ll hook Odion and Edinson and throw on Matic and Fred to try and see out the game”.

Paul Pogba

Meanwhile, record-signing Paul Pogba has confirmed he’ll make an opening 20-minute cameo before being substituted.

“It’ll be a strange feeling to start a game, but this is a great opportunity for me to showcase my talents ahead of the January transfer window”, admitted the 27-year-old.

When asked if he felt he was capable of pretending he was playing anywhere but Old Trafford, the Frenchman confessed: “This may come as a surprise to you, but I do it on a regular basis”.

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