Penalty spot to be renamed ‘the Bruno Dot’ as United streak continues ​

It's only right to mark United's sensational penalty tally

Bruno Fernandes


FIFA have confirmed that the penalty spot will be called the ‘Bruno Dot’ from the beginning of the 2020/21 season onwards.

The decision was taken in order to commemorate United’s impressive haul of 305 spot-kicks this season.

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The Portuguese coolly slotted home his 48th penalty in only his 21st appearance for the Old Trafford outfit as United finally saw off a spirited FC Copenhagen side last night.

Having witnessed Fernandes continue his amazing run, FIFA President Gianni Infantino took the unprecedented step of renaming the penalty spot in the midfielder’s honour:

‘From this day forth, let everyone know the penalty spot shall be known as the Bruno Dot’.

‘Congratulations to Mr Fernandes and Manchester United on their achievements this season. They’ve been handed more penalties than the previous FIFA administration was given by the FBI’.


‘I’m sure everyone will agree with me when I say I’m looking forward to seeing them score plenty more penalties in their next two games’.

Meanwhile, United boss Ole Gunnar Solskjaer was full of praise for his Portuguese playmaker after yet another match-winning display:

‘If Bruno’s performance last night were a song, it’d have to be ‘Give it Away’ by the Red Hot Chili Peppers’.

When asked if he thought renaming the penalty spot was a fitting tribute to his January signing, the Norwegian replied:

‘Everyone at the club’s been calling it the Bruno Dot since he arrived here. So we’re not surprised’.

However, the 47-year-old believes other members of his squad deserve some recognition as well:

‘I’d like to see them rename the treatment table the ‘Luke Shaw Lounger’.

‘And while they’re at it, they should rename the substitutes bench the ‘Phil Jones Pew’.

In other news, BT Sport have confirmed that viewers will be given the additional option of watching a painted wall dry should Wolves face United in the Europa League semi-finals.

‘1-1, 0-0, 0-0, 1-0. We’re all praying these sides don’t meet again’, tweeted Jake Humphrey.

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