Spanish authorities investigate Irish lad NOT wearing GAA shorts on holidays ​

Extremely disturbing developments

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Cuerpo Nacional de Policía are investigating a sighting of an Irish holidaymaker who appeared to be wearing something other than a pair of GAA shorts.

Officers were called this morning after locals reported seeing a pasty red-haired man wandering through the streets of Benidorm minus the standard issue O’Neills apparel.

Every year, thousands of Irish people descend upon popular Spanish holiday resorts adorned in their finest Gaelic Athletic Association garments.

Allianz Football League Division 1, Edendork GAC, Co. Tyrone 9/2/2020
Tyrone vs Kerry
Kerry’s Dara Moynihan and Niall Sludden of Tyrone
Mandatory Credit ©INPHO/Bryan Keane

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However, one Spanish local made the astonishing claim of spotting a ‘freckly man in a pair of Khaki Green cargo shorts’ walking through the town.

‘His flesh was pale but burnt in certain areas. Particularly the shoulders’, recalled barman Jose Noway.

‘He was half pink and half white. Kinda like a walking Drumstick lolly’.

‘I assumed he was Irish, but I couldn’t say with any degree of certainty without the Gaelic gear on him’.

As news of the sighting spread, many began doubting the veracity of the claims.

‘Could you imagine a Limerick lad without his GAA shorts or jersey on holiday?’ scoffed one Irish holidaymaker.

Apartament blocks are pictured along the beach of the seaside resort of Benidorm, on August 5, 2018 – Europe sweltered through an intense heatwave today, with soaring temperatures contributing to forest fires, nuclear plants closing and even threatening the Netherlands’ supply of fries, although some countries experienced a slight respite. (Photo by JOSE JORDAN / AFP) (Photo credit should read JOSE JORDAN/AFP via Getty Images)

‘What the hell next, eh? Scottish fellas not wearing Rangers and Celtic kits? English lads not murdering ‘Sweet Caroline’ on the karaoke then throwing patio furniture about?’.

‘I suppose the Germans won’t be waking up at 5am to leave their beach towels on the sun loungers at the pool either? The world’s gone mad’.

In related news, a Kerry man has written to Richard Branson asking if he can wear his GAA shorts on Virgin Galactic’s maiden space flight.

‘You never know if you might bump into a few Kerry lads in space’, Baz Lightyear told Paddy Power News.

‘Plus, if we come under attack from some hostile extra-terrestrials, they’ll leave me alone and get stuck into the English passengers onboard the space shuttle instead’.

*Paddy Power’s breaking news coverage is 100% fake news*

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