Newcastle to release ‘We beat Burnley 1-0 at home’ Amazon docu-series ​

It's not like you beat Burnley every day... or anyone else, for that matter

Newcastle United are set to release a behind-the-scenes documentary on Amazon Prime entitled: ‘We beat Burnley 1-0 at home’.

The series documenting the richest club in the Premier League’s first win of the season will be available to watch on Amazon and numerous illegal streams.

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‘We beat Burnley 1-0 at home’ will give fans unprecedented access to the Newcastle United changing room where players and staff celebrated the result as though they’d just won the Champions League, World Cup and Royal Rumble.

‘Forget United’s 2nd place finish under Jose and Liverpool’s 2-2 home draw against West Brom, scraping your first win of the season at home against Sean Dyche’s Lancashire Globetrotters trumps them all’, Amazon mogul Jeff Bezos told Paddy Power News.

‘Our cameras will bring you never-seen-before levels of cringe as a squad that’s gone 195 days without a win poses for more photos than a group of women in a nightclub toilet’.

NEWCASTLE UPON TYNE, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 03: A general view of St James’ Park, a venue for the 2012 Olympic Games on February 3, 2012 in Newcastle upon Tyne, England. (Photo by Stu Forster/Getty Images)

‘The story of Newcastle not winning their first league game until December could be best sporting documentary since The Last Dance’.

‘Not that I’ve seen it. It’s on a much more inferior streaming service’, added the 57-year-old billionaire.

Meanwhile, stall vendors outside St James’ Park are also capitalising on Newcastle’s victory with commemorative t-shirts selling faster than they can print them.

‘I’ve totally sold out of ‘I was there when we beat Burnley 1-0’ t-shirts’, one vendor told Paddy Power News.

‘And I’m down to my last box of ‘We’re only bottom of the league on goal difference now’ scarves’.

‘The final whistle on Saturday is the best I’ve felt as a Newcastle supporter since we won back-to-back Texaco Cups in 74 and 75. All the fans were given complimentary Little Trees Air Fresheners’, he added.

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