Nuno’s Tottenham pre-match team talk leaked: ‘Lads, it’s United’

'Nuff said


Nuno Espirito Santo’s simple message to his Tottenham players before kick-off today will be: ‘Lads, it’s United’, Paddy Power News can exclusively reveal.

A club source leaked the Portuguese’s proposed pre-match address ahead of the North London outfit’s Europa Conference League qualification six-pointer against Manchester United.

In what’s been dubbed as ‘EL SACKICO’, Nuno will go head-to-head with United manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer knowing a heavy defeat could cost either man their job. Unless of course, that man’s name is Ole Gunnar Solskjaer.


Having watched Liverpool rip United to shreds at Old Trafford last Sunday, the Spurs boss is supremely confident of victory over Solskjaer’s beleaguered side today.

So much so, he will simply remind his players before kick-off: ‘Lads, it’s United’.

“If we’d been playing a more difficult side such as Norwich or Newcastle, the gaffer might have got the tactics board out and gave the lads some precise instructions,” the club source, who is definitely a real person, told Paddy Power News.


“But Ole’s at the wheel and the opposition look likely to score against United with every attack.”

“Fortunately for Ole, Nuno only likes to do such things once or twice per game so it should be a low scoring defeat for United this week,” added the source.

Meanwhile, PR teams have taken to social media this week to write long-winded posts for United’s players.

“I was so annoyed by my 1/10 performance against Liverpool last Sunday that I almost wrote this post myself,” tweeted some lad on behalf of Harry Maguire.

“Why I was playing so high up the pitch when I’m blessed with the pace of an arthritic sloth I’ll never know.

“Anyways, better sign off now as I’m nearly out of data and will need to keep some for tomorrow’s obligatory post-defeat apology.”

In related news, United midfielder Bruno Fernandes has announced he’ll be publishing a collection of his best post-match social media apologies in a series of hardback books. They’ll be available via all good stockists in time for Christmas.

**Paddy Power’s breaking news coverage is 100% fake news. And that’s the truth.**



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