Liverpool confirm Frode Kippe return ahead of City clash

Getting desperate now lads

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Liverpool have brought veteran defender Frode Kippe back to the club to solve their central defensive woes ahead of Sunday’s clash with Manchester City.

The 42-year-old was a constant presence at the heart of Liverpool’s substitute bench during the late nineties and early noughties and returns to Anfield more than 20-years after making his initial debut.

With an injury crisis forcing Jurgen Klopp to field any old sh*te at the centre of his defence this season, an SOS was sent to the experienced Norwegian affectionately nicknamed ‘the arthritic slug’ by Kopites.

Lillestrøm chairman Morten Kokkim sanctioned the move after receiving an offer he described as ‘too good to be true’.

‘Liverpool gave us 20 krone (£1.70) and Bobby Firmino’s teeth whitening kit’, Kokkim told Paddy Power News.

‘Klopp said he uses the same one and his teeth are now ten shades whiter’.

‘Frode’s been an excellent servant for Lillestrøm but the opportunity to watch him try to keep pace with Raheem Sterling on Sunday was one I just couldn’t turn down’.

Paddy Power News understands Liverpool turned their attentions to Kippe when a deadline day deal for Djimi Traoré failed to materialise.

Looking forward to making his second debut for the Merseyside outfit, Kippe told Paddy Power News:

‘Every time I bumped into a Liverpool fan in the street, they were always asking me ‘Frode, when are you coming back to Anfield? We need you man’.

‘When I watch Liverpool games on the telly, I still get goosebumps when I hear the fans singing my song’.

‘Oh Frode, Frode Kippe, we love you more than Gerrard’s slip’, he sang while wiping a tear from his eye.

Meanwhile, Liverpool boss Klopp was full of praise for the 6ft 5 defender:

‘Having watched him many times this season, all the coaching staff here feel Frode could take Sean Dyche in a scrap’.

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