Mesut Ozil has upped his trolling efforts of Arsenal commissioning a hologram of himself for their visit to Old Trafford on Sunday afternoon, Paddy Power News has learned.
The life-sized replica was inspired by Kanye West’s gift to Kim Kardashian of a light-projected image of her deceased father Robert, in the creepiest gift since “Guess who?” left that single red rose on Rachel in Accounts’ desk for Valentine’s Day.
And the almost ex-Arsenal man plans to show boss Mikel Arteta just what he’s missing with a sequence of skills and tricks that will be projected onto the Old Trafford touchline during the game.
“There will be the trademark Ozil flicks and touches, of course,” a source confirmed, “all delivered with a characteristically insouciant pout.”
“He brought in a couple of extras to play United’s midfielders running past him when he loses the ball as well. There’s no expense spared.”
“It’s incredibly life-like,” the source said.
“There’s also a clip of him rolling up a page of Arteta’s tactical instructions into a ball and throwing them away, as well as him and Gunnersaurus playing darts with a Stan Kroenke-themed board. It’s class.”
The German World Cup winner discovered a new interest in archaeology when the London club threatened to fire their mascot only for the midfielder to step in and pay his wages, and the two have become close pals since.
And the pair plan to take their social media game to the next level as a competitor to AFTV by live-streaming together for Sunday’s game.
Our source confirmed that the millions-of-years-old herbivore will join the outcast playmaker as he provides live commentary updates on Twitter.
“Mesut sees social media as a real growth space for his brand now that he can’t get a game of football.”
When I can't support on the pitch tonight, I will support in front of the TV in London. What are your predictions for the match? I go for a 4-1 away victory 🔴💪🏼 goalscorers @seadk6, @ElNennY, @LacazetteAlex & Pepe😉#UEL #YaGunnersYa
— Mesut Özil (@MesutOzil1088) October 22, 2020
“He’s already live-tweeting games. He’s working on his photoshop skills – he has that little “This is fine” dog mocked up with Mikel’s head cropped on and is just waiting for the right time to drop it – and will be making his own gifs in no time.”
“He’s using this free time to up-skill. Livestreaming is another string to the bow, and if Gunnersaurus gets the sack again they’ll need to have a few options.”
“Especially at his age.”
However, reports that Spurs are looking for a new social media exec and Ozil is in the running for the position have no basis in fact, we were told.
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