Chelsea boss Frank Lampard is delighted the club have reached an agreement with Ajax to sign winger Hakim Ziyech in the summer, as it provides him with yet another excuse for failing to make the top-four.
The 41-year-old manager has repeatedly stated The Blues are underdogs for a Champions League spot this season and believes the acquisition Ziyech has bolstered his claim.
‘He can dribble, he can finish and he’s a real threat from set-pieces. He’s exactly the type of player we should’ve signed in January if we wanted to finish in the top-four’, sighed Lampard.
The former Chelsea skipper was also said to be overjoyed when the club failed to strengthen their squad during the recent transfer window.
The Stamford Bridge outfit were linked with a host of players in January but in the end decided to stick with Olivier Giroud, much to Lampard’s delight.
‘Cavani – wow, what a player. Scores goals for fun. Dodged a bullet there. If we’d signed him and f**ked up top-four, I would’ve had no one to blame but myself’.
‘Thankfully, the club’s decided to stick with Olivier. Sure, he scores the odd worldie. But in the main, he’s sh*te’.
‘He’s the type of player you can point the finger at when you miss out on a Champions League spot’.
Chelsea’s all-time leading goal scorer previously claimed his side were unlikely to secure a top-four finish because newly-promoted Sheffield United had an unfair advantage.
‘Chris Wilder’s job is incredible. I mean, except for the fact he’s on a lot less money, has a squad full of inferior players and has to live in f**king Sheffield – his job is much better than mine’.
‘Let’s not rule out United or Arsenal either. They could put a run of 3 or 4 wins together and bang – they’re right back in the mix’, said a drowning Lampard while clutching at a straw to save his life.
Meanwhile, owner Roman Abramovich said he’s already looking forward to selling Ziyech in a cut-price deal next January before buying him back a year later at twice the original transfer fee.
‘I’d like to wish Hakim all the best when we sell him next Christmas to a Bundesliga side for peanuts’, revealed the Russian billionaire.
Chelsea’s Russian owner Roman Abramovich watches the English FA Cup fourth round replay football match between Chelsea and Brentford at Stamford Bridge in London on February 17, 2013. Chelsea won the game 4-0. AFP PHOTO/GLYN KIRK
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‘I’d also like to welcome him, again, to Chelsea, when we shell out around £80m to bring him back next summer’.
The 53-yr-old businessman is also hoping to add Nathan Ake, Patrick Van-Aanholt and Jeremie Boga to their squad, again.
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