Scottish football Review of the Year: Fitba’s top 5 moments of 2019

Take your face for a shite.

Scottish football review of the year

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2019 has been a wonderful year in the world of Scottish football. Our clubs, fans, pundits, social admins and more have been serving up weekly helpings of patter, brilliance and sh*te all in one go, making it a league like no other.

With many great moments to choose from, it has been a stress-filled slog trying to whittle it down to the five maddest memories of the year but, none the less, here they are.

5. Snakey snakes

Scotland is a country known for animals. From stags interrupting training sessions to pigeons dying in the middle of the pitch and foxes taking a dump on our pitches, there’s always an animal story nearby.

The most talked about animal this year? Snakes. Jordan Jones announced himself to be the first snake of the year, celebrating his move to Ibrox six months before he left Kilmarnock. The fans weren’t particularly pleased but he got the move he wanted so was he bothered? No.

A month later, Brendan Rodgers asked Scottish football to hold his beer and went one better, walking out on Celtic and his chances of winning a treble treble to join Leicester City. To say Celtic fans didn’t take the news well is the world’s biggest understatement.

Despite the messy divorce, Celtic just lifted their tenth consecutive trophy and Rodgers’ Leicester side are currently sitting second in the English Premiership. All’s well that ends well.

4. The Tunnock’s Caramel Wafer Challenge Cup.

Is there much to say here? We named our fourth biggest domestic competition after a biscuit. Not the brand that makes the biscuit, but the actual biscuit itself.

Is it even a biscuit? Who knows.

It’s a truly fantastic name and one I hope never changes again.

3. Craig Levein

A man that truly captures the spirit of Scottish football. Hilarious, dedicated to the patter but very bad at the actual football part. His many press conference quotes will be memes for years to come and I’m sure he’ll be forever loved at Tynecastle.

Sadly, 2019 will be remembered as the year we had to say goodbye to the great Craig Levein. Well not goodbye goodbye, because Ann Budge can’t seem to bring herself to pull the plug, but goodbye. Well not really goodbye, because he’s still so involved that he apparently gave Stendel his tour of Tynecastle, but he’s not in press conferences anymore.

Regrets? No, it’s a good laugh isn’t it.

2. Ryan Kent punching Scott Brown

2-1 down at Celtic park and reduced to nine men, March’s Old Firm wasn’t going well for Rangers. With no chance of a comeback, Ryan Kent – who was on loan from Liverpool at the time – decided to win over the fans the only other way possible and proceeded to lamp Scott Brown. It was a bold move, but one that produced many hilarious photos and earned him a permanent move to Ibrox in the summer.

Who would have thought 43 appearances, six goals, two yellow cards and one common assault would make you worth £7m?

Also, if you thought punching Scott Brown was Rangers going a tad over the top in their quest to be the best, you’ve seen nothing yet. They’re prepared to do, erm, anything…

1. Take your face for a sh*te

Described as “2019’s biggest Scottish football scandal”, Berwick Rangers sacked their social admin after he expertly transcribed a dugout bust up during Berwick’s game against Cowdenbeath back in March.

The move caused outrage, with Scottish football rallying behind the contribution to patter.

Despite the controversy, it wasn’t all bad for Berwick after the sacking. Since dealing with the pesky admin they went 13 games without a goal, sacked Johnny Harvey, got relegated and have since won just 6 of 26 games since their drop from the SPFL.

Hang on, maybe it was all bad…

New Year, New Fitba? Hopefully not.