Ireland v Denmark pips Fast & Furious to crown of worst franchise ever

It’s a fair shout in our opinion.


A poll by IMDb has voted Republic of Ireland v Denmark as the worst franchise of all time, pipping the awful Fast & Furious series to the crown in the process.

A staggering 98% of movie buffs voted Republic of Ireland v Denmark as their least favourite movie franchise ever, even naming Republic of Ireland v Denmark VII: Martin & Roy’s Bogus Journey as the “worst movie of all time”.

The result of the poll comes on the eve of the release of the 11th instalment of the story – Republic of Ireland v Denmark XI: The Saga Continues.

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Many believed that 2018’s critically panned Republic of Ireland v Denmark X: The Quest for a Goal spelt the end of the long-running series.

However, the FAI hoped to breathe new life into the project this summer when they hired Transformers mastermind Michael Bay to direct another big-budget sequel. Bay (54), highly adept at turning vast sums of money into mind-numbing bollocks, seemed like the ideal person to take things forward according to FAI chief Donal Conway.

“Ireland/Denmark games, much the same as Michael’s ‘Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen’, are an interminable f**king bore.

Hours upon end of mind-numbing uneventful drivel is what this fixture’s been all about.

“Michael’s the perfect fit for us.”

Despite the appointment of Bay, critics were unanimous in their disapproval of yet another Republic of Ireland v Denmark sequel, citing the decline in quality as the main reason.

“They should’ve stopped after IV”, argues Chicago-based critic Lisa Trifone of Rotten Tomatoes.

“Like watching some favourite relative die a slow and agonising death”, remarked esteemed critic Jonathan Rosenbaum.

Meanwhile, Fast & Furious star Vin Diesel is reportedly outraged that his own dragged-out movie franchise only finished second in the poll.

“We’ve been robbed”, snapped the follicly challenged actor.

Fast & Furious is unquestionably more tedious and predictable than any Ireland/Denmark flick.

“The story’s always the same. A dispute resolved by a rigged street race between two ridiculously mismatched cars. It’s hardly f**king Citizen Kane”.

In other news, some dodgy fella has turned up down your local flogging pirate copies of Republic of Ireland v Denmark XI: The Saga Continues.

Davy Jones (39) slipped into an advanced screening of the game last week and recorded it using his phone.

“It’s decent quality. Although every so often you can see the silhouette of some guy with IBS walk in front of the screen.”

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