ARSENAL DID WHAT THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO DO
Why is everyone getting in such a frenzy about Arsenal coming back from Stamford Bridge with a point? They’re a huge club with a glittering history – that’s what they’re SUPPOSED to do.
If the Gunners want to be regarded as a side with title-winning credentials (which they’re not), going away to Chelsea and eking out a draw is supposed to be a huge part of the plan.
Just because Wenger got his act together and didn’t send them onto the pitch with a strategy that could have been drawn on the back of fag packet down the pub at 10.40pm on a Friday night doesn’t mean that his club isn’t a gibbering bag of old bollocks.
Even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day.
SERGIO AGUERO IS THE BEST
Another hat trick on Saturday for the Argentine goal machine, but you still get the feeling that he’s somehow underrated, in spite of the fact that his scoring record in six years at City is top notch. Know how many times he’s been voted into the PFA Team Of The Year? Zero. Ridiculous.
THE REAL DAVID LUIZ JUST CAME BACK FOR A BIT
He’s been an inspirational figure in Chelsea’s back three since he returned to the club last year, but it was lovely to see a couple of glimpses of the hair-brained Luiz of old with the ‘challenges’ that led to his red card yesterday. Challenges, assaults, whatever.
EVERYONE NEEDS TO CALM DOWN ABOUT MANCHESTER UNITED
Can everyone stop wanging on about how United are back, back, BACK and how Jose Mourinho has transformed them into near-certain title winners? I could be wrong and that all might be true, but let’s take a more dispassionate look at their season so far.
The teams that they’ve beaten in the league so far are currently occupying four of the seven bottom positions.
The side they couldn’t beat, Stoke City, are eighth bottom. So it’s fair to suggest that they’ve had a pretty easy ride so far. Remember all those draws last season? Yeah, that might all happen again soon, once they play the proper teams.
ROMELU LUKAKU IS A HERO
Stop bleating about his ear-cupped dance in front of the Everton fans who used to idolise him – they were giving him plenty of stick until he scored against them yesterday afternoon.
The sight and sound of football supporters turning into adult babies whenever a player responds to their vitriol by giving them some back is one of the most sickening in the game.
It’s a massive pantomime, you knobheads – stop clutching your pearls and weeping whenever you get a response you don’t like.
HARRY REDKNAPP NEEDS TO RETIRE NOW
Let the record show that Harry Redknapp is no good any more. He might have been once – his West Ham and Spurs sides were half decent and he’s still the last English manager to win a major trophy, but it all went tits up years ago.
The clues were there when he got Southampton relegated but the loveable old Cockney’s tenures at QPR and (until Saturday evening) Birmingham City have been car crash stuff – an ironic description given that he’s most famous for having a conversation out of the window when he should be driving.
Also ironic given that I have to stop myself from screaming and careering into a tree every time I hear some bozo ring up Talksport and proclaim that ‘Arry is definitely the only man for the England job.
BIRMINGHAM CITY IS A BASKET CASE
Look, I’m a Sunderland fan and even I find myself looking at the fiasco that has unfolded at St. Andrew’s over the past year or so and being grateful for the basket case of a club that I follow myself.
HOLLYWOOD ACTORS NEED TO GET THEIR HANDS DIRTY
Apparently Channing Tatum (no, me neither) showed up at Stamford Bridge yesterday, prompting the usual cutaway shot accompanied by a commentator pointing him out, seconds after having his name read out to him in his earpiece.
I’m bored of seeing these A-listers pitching up to the executive areas of London’s swankiest stadiums.
Could they do it away at Stoke on a wet Tuesday night? Doubt it…
HUDDERSFIELD CLAPPERS – NEIN DANKE
What is it with ‘plucky underdog’ clubs and those clapper thingies? Leicester City’s Premier League win will forever be tainted by their aural assistance and now Huddersfield Town are deploying them too.
Is no one running things at FIFA now that Sepp Blatter has gone?
Where’s the automatic 12-point deduction that these noisy atrocities deserve?
THE ONLY THING SHAKIER THAN HUDDERSFIELD’S RATTLES IS LIVERPOOL’S DEFENCE
If you can’t keep a clean sheet at home against Burnley, you’re not going to win any trophies. Jurgen Klopp continues to come out with a series of excuses for his side’s defensive shoddiness, which is impressive as English is his second language, but a football team needs to defend as well as attack and we’re all starting to wonder if he’s really all that now.