Paddy Power’s terrifying and occasionally alluring gender switch football quiz

Web boffins have created a new app which lets people change the gender of people in photos. We we tired of turning our mates into old blokes, and thought where better to test out this terrifying new technology than the world of Association Football?

We’ve taken 20 familiar footballing faces and ran their head-shots through the wonderful “FaceApp”. See how many of the 20 you can guess correctly. If you need any help, just click the head in question to reveal their true identities.

Bonus points are awarded if you can genuinely avoid getting the horn (and immediately feeling ashamed) at any point in this quiz.

Alexis Sanchez

Yes, it’s Arsenal’s little Chillean kicking things off with a tidy centre parting and a wholesome, make-up free face. Smashing stuff!



Zlatan Ibrahimovic

Zlatan here has clearly overdone it on the foundation, and looks a bit like one of those girls who appears in those adverts for new miracle skin product which promises to “make you look 15 years younger, or your money back!”



Philippe Coutinho

Another wholesome, friendly look from Liverpool’s midfield maestro, whose female form has the look of a daytime TV soap star.



Arsene Wenger

Ooooh la la! Mademoiselle Wenger has a certain sultry, gallic charm as she gazes into the sunset. She looks like she’s spent a lifetime singing in the nightclubs of Paris and smoking Gitanes.



Lionel Messi

Barcelona’s pint-sized magician has a touch of Posh Spice about her, and really scrubs up rather well, once you remove her beard.



Harry Redknapp

To be honest, it took the app nearly an hour to remove all the wrinkles from poor Harry’s withered face. Having done so, it appears to have simply stuck a ginger wig on his head and left him looking like the former Sun editor, Rebekah Brooks.



Kevin Kilbane

Ireland’s legendary defensive stalwart has the air of a fresh faced Rose of Tralee entrant about her. She won’t win first prize, but there’s a fair chance you’ll shift her in Coppers in 12 months’ time.



Cristiano Ronaldo

Ms Ronaldo is clearly one of the finest looking women in our study, although true to form, she’s not quite as attractive as the female version of Lionel Messi



Jamie Vardy

The female Vardy is blessed with huge, cat-like eyes. It’s like Emma Stone in a Leicester nightclub after drinking nine WKD Blues.



Danny Welbeck

Joking aside, Danny Welbeck is the only person in the quiz who appears less attractive as a woman than he does as a man.



Romelu Lukaku

Another strong entry from Belgium’s finest. Weirdly, a glitch in the app appears to have added some sort of tropical bird on her right shoulder, which adds to the appeal and really sets off her eyes.



Petr Cech

I’m not going to lie to you. I only included Cech to see if the app would convert his headgear into some sort of giagantic Amy Winehouse-style beehive. Instead he looks like a supermodel who’s been kicked in the head by Stephen Hunt.



Phil Jones

It’s Phillipa Jones. Phil’s long lost, gurning cousin. She’s a lot more pleasing on the eye, but still downright f**king terrifying.



Diego Costa

Mrs Costa looks just as much of a bastard as her male form does. She looks like the sort of woman who’d use the “10 items or fewer” queue in Tesco and flash you a dirty look as she scans through her 25th 4-pack of bog roll.



Jesus Navas

Seriously, don’t even bother looking. There is no footballer in the world who looks hotter as a woman than Jesus Navas. Game over.



Kolo Toure

There is no need to be upset! Lovely Kolo will make everything better!



Wayne Rooney

Eugh. It’s like the bastard offspring of Vicky Pollard from Little Britain and Gollum from Lord of the Rings. She looks like she’d happy slap you in the queue for the chippy. Nightmare.



Neymar Jnr

Lovely Neymar looks all set for carnival season in Rio. A dash of eye shadow, fake lashes, and her hair tied up in a bun. You go Girl!



Gareth Bale

She’s overdone the lipstick a little bit, but aside from that you’d be swiping right all day long on Bale’s female form.



Harry Kane

Jaysus! Kane has been turned into a blonde bombshell, and looks like she’s been just finished 16th in the 1997 Miss Alabama beauty pageant.