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Ireland’s record winless run took place between 1968 and 1971, where they went 20 games without a victory.
It might seem like we’ve surpassed that number fourfold in the last few months, but thankfully/sadly, we haven’t – it’s just been so drawn out with everything going on, that you’ve not had anything else to focus on in that time.
In reality, we’re just over halfway there, as a young Jon Bon Jovi once sang. Come to think of it, that washed-up rocker without an athletic bone in his body could definitely do a job for us in Andorra. Someone get him on the blower swiftly.
17:00: Andorra v Republic of Ireland
Sky Sports Premier League
In all seriousness, there have been embarrassments and there have been embarrassments.
Cyprus certainly comes to mind, as does the most recent mortification in the Aviva against Luxembourg – but I feel like a defeat in Andorra, which is merely just a working title for a mountain range – would be the absolute pinnacle of this association’s on-field shortcomings.
As the FAI are yet to send out a reimbursement package to the nation for the nonsense they’ve put us through, we reckon we can at least make a few quid back on our own behalf. Here’s three of the best to cap off what might be 13 of the worst.
If there’s a human being alive who believes Ireland can score four goals in a game, then I’d like to meet them. Furthermore, if there’s someone out there who genuinely thinks Andorra can muster up the footballing ability to knock one in, I’d be all ears.
I don’t like calling something bombproof, but this feels like the closest you can come to it, particularly as there’ll be wholesale changes in this Ireland squad as Stephen Kenny still tries to figure out ways to make his squad as competitive as possible.
Irish players combined for the 31st-highest figure in Europe’s top-five leagues this campaign – one of just 32 nations to have over 20,000 minutes played.
Our top-end players are knackered which means they’ll likely not feature in this otherwise meaningless friendly – and even if they do, it’ll be a cameo at best.
Not that any of their performances in recent times had resembled anything other than cameos in the first place of course – but you know what I’m getting at. Ireland should land a win here, but it’ll be hard-got.
I’m sorry, but if you ever go through an Ireland market check without seeing the price of a 1-1 draw, you’re not familiar enough with the association.
There’s a few certainties in life. The first one is death, ultimately. The second one has never been taxes – I don’t know where that came from – but it’s a rainy May in Manchester. Thirdly, if Ireland are playing in a game of football, it’s going to finish a goal apiece.
Now, I’ve not run the numbers on that, but anyone who’s felt the highs and considerable lows of following this country will be able to relate. Trust us.
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