Chelsea agree to return £60m Mason Mount fee in Garnacho deal

Cheeky

Chelsea have finally agreed to return the money they stole from Manchester United for Mason Mount – if INEOS send Alejandro Garnacho to Stamford Bridge in exchange.

The Blues pulled off one of the greatest heists in modern times when they managed to convince United to fork out £60m for injury-prone Mount who was in the final year of his Chelsea contract.

Mount has made over 150 appearances in the United treatment room since joining the club in July 2023.

 

Garnacho is understood to be willing to make the move after falling out of favour with the United supporters who have identified the 20-year-old winger as ‘the problem’ with the club.

The United unfaithful will hope they finally have their man after mistakenly identifying Marcus Rashford, Scott McTominay, Aaron Wan-Bissaka, Jadon Sancho, Anthony Martial, David De Gea, Paul Pogba, Jesse Lingard and Cristiano Ronaldo as the problem.

‘Yes, selling ‘Missing Mount’ for 60 million quid to United was a sh*thouse move’, Chelsea owner Todd Boehly admitted to Paddy Power News.

‘So, as a gesture of goodwill, we’re willing to return the money – IF, they give us Garnacho.

‘Garnacho would be a £60m replacement for Pedro Neto who was a £60m replacement for Mykhailo Mudryk who was a £60m replacement for Christian Pulisic’.

Meanwhile, United co-owners INEOS are currently debating the different ways they could waste the £60m they’ll receive for the Argentinian.

‘Spending it on substandard or injury-prone players is too obvious’, Sir Jim Ratcliffe told Paddy Power News.

‘We could just shovel the 60 million quid into a woodchipper, or set fire to it?’

‘I wonder if Antony has a brother who’s even worse at football that we could sign?’

In other news, United goalkeeper Andre Onana has explained his gaffe during the Reds’ 3-1 defeat to Brighton.

Brighton capitalised on a disastrous mistake from Onana to condemn their hosts to a fourth defeat in five Premier League home games.

The Cameroon international is known to apply a generous amount of Vaseline directly to his gloves during games in a bid to improve his grip.

However, the 28-year-old claims foul play was afoot.

‘Someone swapped my petroleum jelly for butter’, said the former Ajax No1.

*Paddy Power News’s footy news is pure fantasy – don’t believe it for a second

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