Mardy rocker Noel Gallagher has found himself at the centre of another ticket scandal after it was suggested the new Manchester City fourth kit, designed by the Oasis legend, will be sold using dynamic ticket pricing.
Having been in the spotlight after reunion tickets saw a price hike of around 500% due to “market demand”, the songwriter has chosen gone into hiding following the controversy in the loft of his London mansion where he has lived for 20 years after abandoning his Mancunian roots at the first possible opportunity.
“He’s completely at peace up there not having to deal with any northerners,” confirmed his maid.
“It’s just frustrating because the megastore was ram packed with 15 or so die-hard City supporters, yet the guy in front of me paid £35 for the top, whereas I paid £2,786 for it about two minutes later,” said a grumpy City fan.
While scandal seems to follow both Oasis and Man City everywhere they go, it hasn’t been all bad news coming from the ‘Definitely City’ kit launch, with the campaign continuing to gain traction after it was revealed that Noel has invited City boss Pep Guardiola to write a new song for the band.
Having been allowed to design a kit for the players, it was agreed the favour would be returned, with Pep putting pen to paper on a catchy chorus, whilst the likes of Phil Foden, Erling Haaland and Rodri would all take a bash at a verse each for Liam Gallagher to sing.
Unboxing the Definitely City kit with Noel Gallagher himself 🤩 pic.twitter.com/pNCmeouOl3
— Manchester City (@ManCity) September 12, 2024
The song is expected to be far better than anything released by Oasis post (What’s the Story) Morning Glory, which came out in 1995.
The Noel Gallagher PR team released an official statement to clarify all matters:
“Noel has been hoodwinked into dynamic ticket surge prices. It was all Liam’s idea, please blame him – he’s in a WhatsApp group with Noel’s ex and Gary Neville and they’ve come up with this smear campaign.
“After the success of the Definitely City range, which has sold around 10 kits in total, Noel will also be releasing a range of bucket hats and inflatable bananas which will be made available by Christmas.
“Furthermore, we are proud to confirm Noel has been asked to design Taylor Swift’s dress for the Met Gala. She has chosen to drop Armani in favour of an original Gallagher piece sponsored by Brother printers.”
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