Liverpool chief executive Michael Edwards has confirmed the Anfield club will follow the example set by arch-rivals Manchester United in their search for Jurgen Klopp’s successor.
After returning to the club last month, Edwards has been charged with finding Klopp’s replacement.
And the former sporting director has revealed he is adopting United’s approach to recruitment by targeting follicly-challenged Dutchmen with a couple of decent seasons in the Eredivisie under their belts.
‘The balder the better. Smooth, like a dolphin’s beak’, Edwards told Paddy Power News.
‘You only have to look down the road at how well it’s working out for United since hiring Ten Hag’.
‘Two years and half a billion pounds later, they can be 3-0 up against Coventry with fifteen minutes to go and still need a dodgy VAR call and a penalty shootout to win the game.
‘That’s the level of stomach-churning soul-destroying drama Liverpool fans want to endure week in, week out’.
‘Obviously the new manager will be given a blank cheque book to sign all the players he worked with at his previous clubs in Holland.
‘Our scouts are on the lookout for the next Antony.
They’ve identified a couple of young lads they value at around £20-25m. So, obviously we’ll be lodging 90 million bids with their clubs once the transfer window reopens.’
Quizzed on rumours linking the Merseyside outfit with Feyenoord boss Arne Slot, Edwards revealed:
‘Slot fits the bill, in that: he’s relatively inexperienced; won a couple of Dutch cups and has a head with less hair than a stuntman’s elbow’.
‘It will be great to see Slot and Ten Hag on the sidelines together at Anfield next season, looking like a reunion between Hank Schrader and Walter White’.
However, Edwards refused to be drawn on whether Liverpool would also emulate United’s policy of hiring managers, allowing them to spend £500m, then sacking them after two years.
‘We have a fanbase spoilt by recent success. Our team is in decline and most of our ex-players are opinionated pundits. So, all the ingredients for a biannual sacking are there’.
*Paddy Power’s football coverage is pure fantasy – don’t believe it for a second.
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