Vin Diesel, Sir Ben Kingsley & Voldemort issue messages of support to Erik ten Hag

Ten Hag's side have been a bit short up top in recent weeks...


Follicly challenged men around the world are showing solidarity with Manchester United boss Erik Ten Hag following baldist comments by Chilean star Arturo Vidal.

The Athletico Paranaense midfielder propagated the offensive stereotype that bald men are complicated during an interview in which he criticided Ten Hag’s treatment of Cristiano Ronaldo.

‘That coach came in badly. Or should I say, baldy,” Vidal said referring to the Dutchman’s arrival in Manchester.

“How are you going to take out Cristiano Ronaldo? The bald guys are very complicated. It’s no coincidence that most villains are slapheads.

“Lex Luther, Ming the Merciless, The Kurgan from the Highlander franchise. They’re all chrome domes.

“And all the good guys have long hair. Rambo, Thor… Jesus.”

Erik Ten Hag

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The baldist comments caused a massive stir online with calls for Vidal to be banned from football or worse, forced to sign for Luton.

As the fallout continues, many famous shaven-headed men have voiced their support for Ten Hag and called for an end to discrimination against the bald community.

“Every time I slap my head, another bald man is subjected to sickening baldist abuse,” The Fast and the Furious star Vin Diesel said in a black and white video he posted to YouTube.

“Together, we can end baldism for good. Which is why I’m asking everyone to show solidarity with Erik tonight at 8pm by wearing a swim cap and clapping at your front door.’

Gandhi actor Sir Ben Kingsley showed solidarity with Ten Hag by cable-tying himself by the neck to a goalpost at Old Trafford.

It took security staff 20 minutes to free the 79-year-old meaning Sir Ben has spent more time on the Old Trafford pitch than Donny van de Beek has during his entire United career.

And finally, Ten Hag received support from Lord Voldemort who broke down in tears during an emotional interview on ITV’s This Morning as he recalled the baldist behaviour he suffered at the hands of a schoolboy.

“Just because I murdered his parents and tried to murder him when he was a baby, there was still no need to call me a baldy b*****d,” sobbed the evil wizard.

*Paddy Power’s breaking news coverage is 100% nonsense, but you knew that already… didn’t you?

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