On the eve of the Manchester derby, a bitter war of words has broken out between United boss Erik ten Hag and his City counterpart Pep Guardiola, over who looks better in a roll neck sweater.
An Old Trafford insider explained to Paddy Power News that Ten Hag’s pre-match press conference has had to be edited after the Dutch tactician was ready to refer to Pep as looking like a “Fisherman missing his trawler” as the mind games start ahead of Saturday lunchtime’s showdown.
He is understood to have told close associates: “Maybe he has some nautical ancestry in his family, but he wouldn’t look out of place cruising up and down the canals of Amsterdam on a Dutch barge in that get up.
“Also, how many Alpacas are now freezing their nuts off so he can keep warm?”
Over at The Etihad, after Guardiola had got wind of Ten Hag’s comments and still a little spikey after losing to Southampton in the Carabao Cup, he quickly responded by claiming that his cross town rival looked like a “badly packed sausage” in his suit and sweater combo.
“My chunky jumper is practical for living in Manchester and is bang on trend”
“He has to wear one of those quilted Adidas coats over his because merino wool is nowhere near warm enough on matchday up here,” he continued.
He was also keen to stress that, “No Alpacas were harmed in the making of my sweater pal.”
Paddy Power News was keen to get the opinions of a style expert, so we contacted the editor a popular men’s fashion publication for his verdict on who wore it better.
“Guardiola has certainly had to pick up the baton of managerial style guru since Scott Parker got sacked at Bournemouth” he explained, “He’s gone through several image changes during his time at City.
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“His latest incarnation has a maritime flavour for sure and I could certainly picture him on a Catalan rowing boat heading out to sea to catch his dinner.
“What I will say is that if wearing this jumper prevents him from having to don those hideous club hoodies, then all’s well and good.”
So what about his opposite number this weekend?
“To say Ten Hag looks like a badly packed sausage is a little harsh in my opinion.
“Badly-packed chicken is more accurate.”
He reminds me of someone who has failed an audition to become the new Bond villain. Hope this helps.”
Well not really, but we take your point.
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