Breaking News: Mbappe puts Messi on PSG transfer list

Following the most dramatic World Cup final in history, PSG Director of Football Kylian Mbappe has invited offers for Lionel Messi


World Cup hero Lionel Messi is understood to be on his way out of PSG according to reports coming from the club.

Following the most dramatic football match in history which saw French forward Kylian Mbappe score a hat-trick and still end up on the losing side, eyewitnesses suggest the 24-year-old didn’t take defeat gracefully and barged his way into the Argentina dressing room after the match to inform club teammate Messi that he will never play for PSG again.

MANCHESTER, ENGLAND – NOVEMBER 24: Lionel Messi of Paris Saint-Germain looks on during the UEFA Champions League group A match between Manchester City and Paris Saint-Germain at Etihad Stadium on November 24, 2021 in Manchester, England. (Photo by Shaun Botterill/Getty Images)

“Kylian is sick of the sight of him. He didn’t want him at PSG in the first place, so now he is a club director as well as a player, he has the power to sack him.

“He’s hoping to sell him off to Saudi Arabia where he and Cristiano Ronaldo can grow old together out of sight,” confirmed a French journalist.


With Messi only interested in enjoying his celebrations as a World Cup winner and having zero interest in discussing club football, it is believed he managed to avoid confrontation with Mbappe by putting on his cloak of invisibility which was handed to him by a Qatar representative during the trophy presentation.

“It took Mbappe over an hour to find Messi who was giggling away under his cloak,” confirmed an Argentinian physio.

Further fallout from the World Cup final came when a supporter questioned why Sergio Aguero was on the pitch celebrating in a full kit alongside the squad despite no longer being a player.

A source close the former City man confirmed he took inspiration from John Terry’s “full-kit-w*nker” antics at the 2012 Champions League final.

Celebrations continued to reach all corners of the globe throughout the night, with the streets of Brighton littered with supporters of the club who were out celebrating their World Cup success.

“For 50 years West Ham fans have gone around saying they won the World Cup in 1966 because Bobby Moore played, so guess what? We won the World Cup in 2022 because of Alexis Mac Allister. Can you believe it, Brighton are World Cup winners! It’s a wonderful feeling,” confirmed a Brighton supporter to local journalists.

Elsewhere, it wasn’t a happy night in the Ronaldo residence, with Cristiano described as “unbearable” to be around.

“He was throwing his arms up in the air whilst sitting on the sofa watching his nemesis cement his status as the real GOAT. Not even a quick sunbed and manicure could get him out of his foul mood,” confirmed his in-house beauty therapist.

*Paddy Power’s breaking news coverage is 110% nonsense

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