Manchester United have offered a contract to former Stoke City striker James Beattie after failing with an £8 million bid for Marko Arnautovic.
44-year-old Beattie, who retired from professional football in 2013, is viewed by senior Old Trafford figures as the ideal man to bolster United’s attack.
‘James is someone who’s been on our radar since half nine this morning’, United director of football John Murtough told Paddy Power News.
‘He fits the criteria for the type of player we’re hoping to bring to the club, in that, he’s a middle-aged injury-prone striker who just happens to be available near the end of the transfer window’.
‘Erik told us three months ago he needed more attacking options so we’re hoping to have this deal wrapped up at approximately 11pm on Deadline Day’.
When asked whether the club had a contingency plan in place should they miss out on Beattie’s signature, Murtough replied:
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‘Ricardo Fuller is on a free. Kenwyne Jones, that’s another option. Rory Delap can do a job up top, and he’s got that long throw. Imagine Cristiano getting on the end of those? If he stays.’
Meanwhile, United have offered Adrien Rabiot’s mother a central midfield berth as the club tries desperately to get a deal for her son over the line.
Erik Ten Hag views no-nonsense Veronique Rabiot as the ideal midfield enforcer his team is crying out for.
It’s hoped the mother and son would be registered in time for United’s humiliating defeat at Brentford next weekend.
‘She couldn’t be any worse than McFred’, Ten Hag told Paddy Power News.
‘In fact, the Rabiot family dog would probably get a game for us in midfield.
‘Even if the animal spent the entire 90 minutes pissing up a corner flag or humping the ref’s leg, it would still have had a better game than McFred yesterday’.
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