Manchester United make £60m transfer bid for Frankie Dettori ​

Not to be confused with Barcelona star Frenkie de Jong. Obviously.

Manchester United have made an approved offer to sign Italian horse racing jockey Frankie Dettori, Paddy Power News can exclusively reveal.

Diminutive Dettori has been linked with United ever since Erik ten Hag took charge of the club at the end of last season.

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Despite being linked heavily with Barcelona’s Dutch midfield maestro Frenkie de Jong, who played under new manager Erik ten Hag at Ajax, it’s a fellow Frankie the club’s shrewdies have lodged an offer for.

A deal has yet to be agreed after United’s opening bid, much like Dettori himself, was considered desperately short.

However, the Old Trafford outfit are prepared to increase their offer as they hope to persuade the champion jockey to make the jump into professional football.

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United scouts view Dettori, who’s 5ft 4in and about 9st, as the commanding presence they were missing last season after shipping a record high 57 Premier League goals.

“Ever since I was a little man, I’ve always dreamed of playing for Manchester United,” Dettori told Paddy Power News.

“I cannot wait to gallop across the hallowed Old Trafford turf. I hear it’s good to soft.”

When asked if he was looking forward to meeting his teammates, the 51-year-old said: “Not really. But it might do them good to meet someone who’s been involved in a title race in the past nine years.”

In related news, a group of hardcore United fans calling themselves ‘The Spirit of Djemba-Djemba’ had been planning to stage a protest outside the home of Fred the Red over the transfer.

It is understood the Old Trafford mascot was targeted, as he was only remaining club affiliate not to have been doorstepped.

However, after catching wind of the protest, Fred agreed to meet the disgruntled supporters at his local pub, The Devil and Duck.

Footage of the meeting appeared on social media last night with Fred addressing fans concerns about the future of the club over a rake of pints.

He said: “Everybody knew Pogba was a tw*t but not as big a tw*t as that Gunnersaurus. Dearie me, has he gone up his own arse since that time he was sacked for five minutes.

“He let the fame go right to his big green head.”

On United’s struggles in the transfer market, Fred remarked: “Frenkie de Jong? Never heard of her? Was she in that band The Saturdays?

“Don’t even watch football, mate. Just a job this mascot gig, isn’t it?”

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