Ralf Rangnick has taken charge of his first Austria training session and wasted no time in telling the squad how sh*t they are.
The 63-year-old was putting his players through their paces for the first time ahead of their Nations League matches against Croatia, Denmark and France.
NEW TO PADDY POWER NEWS?
Rangnick took the opportunity to introduce himself to each player before telling them how sh*te he thought they were.
After the impromptu one-on-ones, several players made irate phone calls to their agents while others were reduced to tears.
‘It was a good session. We did a 15-minute warm-up followed by some pressing drills. Then I told each individual player how sh*t I thought they were’, the German told Paddy Power News.
‘How sh*t? Well, on a scale of 1 to Man United, I’d say they’re a 7’.
‘I told some of the lads they’d be better off selling Avon than pursuing a career in professional football’.
‘As you can imagine, morale in the camp is low right now but I believe honesty is the best policy’.
The former RB Leipzig boss then fielded some questions about his recent appointment as the Austrian national team coach.
‘Am I happy to be the new Austria manager? I’d have to say no’.
‘I only agreed to manage them to get out of my United contract’.
‘It’s like when you order the German national team coach’s job off wish.com’.
‘They speak the same language and their kits look the same but the Austrians are sh*te at the football part’.
‘Also, Arnold Schwarzenegger couldn’t act his way out of a wet paper bag’.
‘David Hasselhoff. Now there’s an actor’.
Rangnick ended the press conference early to leave a Tripadvisor review of the Austrian team hotel, which read:
‘Bloody awful. At breakfast, someone folded my napkin into a swan. Swans are sh*t. One star. Won’t be back’.
*Paddy Power News football coverage is 100% fake news – honest*
- Breaking: Liverpool fears mount as Sergio Ramos spotted near Stade de France
- Jack Grealish wakes up with Mike Tyson’s tiger in his hotel room
- Vieira accepts Big Dunc’s Hell in a Cell Challenge after Goodison clash
- Peter Crouch: I was FUMING on the bench for 2007 Champions League final
- Cristiano Ronaldo betting specials: Who could Man Utd star join this summer?