Manchester United misfit Jadon Sancho has been seen wandering aimlessly and alone down Wembley Way ahead of England’s clash with Albania.
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It is understood that the former Borussia Dortmund star who now warms the bench at Old Trafford was spotted in the early hours of the morning by local reporters appearing dishevelled, strolling at a slow pace with his hands in his pockets looking absolutely bored with life.
“We couldn’t tell if he was coming home from a big night out or if he was on his way to an early start somewhere, but he only had one shoe on, was muttering things to himself about the Great British Bake Off and just seemed all over the shop,” confirmed a journalist.
“We didn’t want to approach him so instead took a load of photos which will probably be on the front page of tomorrow’s newspaper.
“He was somewhere between Alan Partridge driving to Dundee scoffing Toblerone, Wayne Rooney asleep in a hotel room after a massive sesh and a zombie from the apocalypse, so definitely one to avoid.”
Paddy Power News managed to grab a quick word with Sancho who offered this explanation.
“I was just really bored so decided to go for a walk and ended up at Wembley.
“Obviously I won’t be on the pitch and I don’t have a ticket for the game, so I think I’ll just hang around outside with other fans, drink a few cans and soak up the atmosphere,” confirmed Jadon.
“I just bloody love international football.”
“It’s just lovely to be away from the doom and gloom of my life where I spend all week long sitting on my arse talking to Jesse Lingard about Strictly Come Dancing and the Bake Off, so a London road trip is exactly what the doctor ordered.
“I’ve actually text Donny Van de Beek, Aaron Wan-Bissaka and Mason Greenwood to see if they fancy meeting me a bit later today, but none of them have replied. I’ve just joined their support group for professional footballers who could have been great international players if it wasn’t for their manager f*cking them over,” he said, before blubbing “Just miss it so much… Take me back, Gareth…”
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