Liverpool v Ajax: BT Sport charging £9.95 for Klopp v Kelly II ​​

Seconds out, round two

BT Sport are pushing ahead with plans to charge for the explosive post-match confrontations between their touchline tussler Des Kelly and managerial heavyweights, starting with Jurgen Klopp tonight.

The pair got it on because they don’t get along – over broadcasters’ role in scheduling televised games specifically – on Saturday after Liverpool were denied three points by a VAR-awarded last-minute penalty against Brighton.

And, after the success of coaxing bleary-eyed punters to pay £20 to watch a glorified sparring session between Mike Tyson and Roy Jones Jr on Saturday night, the broadcaster sees no reason not to ask people to fork out a tenner to watch Destroyer Kelly and Der AKloppalypse go toe-to-toe again.

“It’ll be more entertaining than the Tyson bout, no doubt, and you don’t need to mainline Red Bull to stay awake for it,” a source close to the situation said.

And they confirmed that there’s a huge production planned around tonight’s game at Anfield.

“As Sweet Caroline blares from the Anfield PA system, Des ‘Destroyer’ Kelly will enter the arena on a solid gold chariot pulled by Owen Hargreaves, Michael Owen and Robbie Savage for the post-match interviews.

Jurgen Klopp

“Klopp planned to wear a giant, metallic clock face pointing to 12:30pm on a chain around his neck but was worried the effort carrying it would take away from his effort at sarcastic replies in the interview itself.”

“Michael Buffer’s even being piped in from Vegas to give it the ‘Let’s get ready to rumble’ over the tannoy.”

And reports from within Anfield show that Jurgen ‘Der AKloppalypse’ Klopp is approaching the rematch hoping to land a decisive blow in his running battle with broadcasters.

“Jurgen’s spent the last week getting a ‘certificate of achievement’ from the Online University of Herverd – not to be confused with Harvard – in Physiology and Sports Science,” our Reds insider told us.

“If Des challenges him again on kick-off times and recovery, he’s ready as he’s watched at least nine Youtube videos on the science. They even give you a PDF scroll to print out if he wants to see some credentials.

“And he’s got the facts on coronavirus and 5G from the same Youtube channel too, so if Des brings that up It’ll be a first-round knockout”.


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