Guardiola commits to 2 more years of not winning the Champions League at City ​

He's in it for the long haul

Pep Guardiola has confirmed he won’t win the Champions League until 2024 at the earliest.

The 49-year-old signed a new contract that will see him exit the competition at the quarter-final stage with Manchester City for two more years.

The Spaniard’s current deal was set to expire at the end of the season with many expecting the former Barcelona and Bayern Munich manager to take charge of some other wealthy European club who always win their domestic title.

Addressing the 17 non-bot followers on City’s official Twitter account, Guardiola said:

‘Barca are sh*te, Bayern won’t have me back and Juventus can’t afford me. With that in mind, I’ve decided to stick around at City where we can achieve many quarter-final exits together’.

‘The chairman and I share a vision for the next 2 years which involves another couple Carabao Cup finals and multiple failed attempts to sign Lionel Messi’.

‘I have a desire to help all the players, except John Stones. And hope to go down as the greatest manager in this club’s illustrious 12-year history’.

Chairman Khaldoon Al Mubarak added:

‘After long talks this week between myself and Pep, we both agreed we couldn’t do better than each other’.

‘When we set off on this wonderful journey, Pep outlined his plan for winning the Champions League which was simply, sign f**king Lionel Messi’.

‘Despite our best efforts, the greedy little pr*ck will not leave Barca. And so, we’re looking forward to another 2-years of premature Champions League exits under Pep’.

In other news, the announcement was welcomed by clubs across Europe hoping to draw City in the knockout stages of this season’s competition.

‘As good as a bye into the semis’, tweeted Tottenham.

‘Get the pipe and slippers at the ready lads’, added Lyon.

‘Feel like pure sh*t. Just want my Man City back’, tweeted Shakhtar Donetsk.


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