Peter Odemwingie rushes to defend Dominic Cummings after marathon road trip

Heartening solidarity from the former West Brom forward.


Former West Brom forward and long-distance car journey enthusiast Peter Odemwingie has voiced his support for under-fire Tory advisor Dominic Cummings, it has emerged.

Odemwingie – who became infamous after piloting his vehicle from Birmingham to London in an effort to (unsuccessfully) force a move from the Baggies to QPR – leaped to the defence of Cummings with a series of quotes to reporters in the Durham Cathedral car park this morning.

“Listen, you’ve simply got to admire that level of drive – no pun intended haha – in a person,” commented the ex-Nigeria international.

“It takes guts to jump into a car and motor along for several hours in order to create a farcical incident that will ultimately come to define your professional career. For me, big Dom’s outdone even me there. Top lad and pure class behind the wheel.”

Cummings, widely hailed as the brains behind the most incompetent British government in living memory, is thought to be grateful for Odemwingie’s showing of empathy.

“I’m feeling very attacked right now,” he said while clutching a Peppa the Pig beach ball. “All I did was defy the stringent and non-negotiable rules set out by the government I supposedly control. I mean, what’s the big deal? It’s just great to know that fellow automobile voyagers like Peter are there for me in these difficult times.”

Unfortunately for the soon-to-be-former political aide, Odemwingie’s words are unlikely to keep Cummings in his current role, despite an ongoing charm-offensive from the PR wing of the Conservative party, also known as the BBC.

Such has been the outcry that political satirists and occasional bookmakers Paddy Power have offered odds on his sacking.

Meanwhile, sources close to the government have suggested that there is no truth in the rumours that Cummings had in fact travelled to Durham in a desperate attempt to push through a transfer to the Liberal Democrats.

Cummings is 11/10 to no longer be employed in his current role on June 1st

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