7 reasons why Neil Warnock should be the next Arsenal manager

You know it makes sense!

One of football’s most colourful, divisive, yet entertaining characters has blown the full-time whistle on his managerial career spanning four decades.

Cardiff City boss Neil Warnock has parted company with Championship side whom he guided to Premier League promotion in the 2017-18 season.

But in this era of suave continental coaches, we feel the game needs an old-school Yorkshireman effing and blinding on the touchline.

The one thing missing from Warnock’s colossal CV is a stint at one of England’s top clubs and given Unai’s Emery’s recent struggles at Arsenal, he could yet be presented with the perfect opportunity.

Here are seven reasons why Warnock should take charge of The Gunners…

VAR video assistant referee

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He’s a visionary and one of the pioneers of VAR

2019 finally saw the introduction of the Video Assistant Referee to English football’s top division.

However, Neil Warnock championed the idea of using such technology back in 2001 following his Sheffield United side’s controversial defeat to Southampton. The fiery Yorkshireman implored English football’s governing body to assist its struggling officials during an impassioned post-match interview.

“David Elleray was that far away he would have needed binoculars. I really think it’s about time we use the means to sort these things out rather than relying on some bald-headed bloke standing 50 yards away.”

A throwback to Wenger’s touchline rivalries

It’s all gone a bit boring on the Emirates touchline since Arsene Wenger left the club. The lanky Frenchman fought with everyone from Sir Alex Ferguson, to Jose Mourinho – even the zipper on his ridiculously long bench coat.

In Neil Warnock, Gunners fans have a manager who would start a row in an empty house. The 70-year-old has clashed with just about every opponent he’s encountered during his lengthy career.

Highlights include the time he shouted at Liverpool assistant Phil Thompson: “You can f*ck off Pinocchio, get back in your f*cking cupboard”; revealing he “wouldn’t p*ss on Gary Megson if he were on fire” and the iconic line from his autobiography: “I had always known Stan Ternent was a d*ckhead”.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVdfDa-PJSc&t

Arsenal fans would love to see one of his infamous half-time rollockings

Warnock has already provided football with THE most entertaining fly-on-the-wall documentary produced when he invited TV cameras to Bramall Lane to document Sheffield United’s 2004/05 season.

The expletive-laden footage shows Warnock ripping into his players during half-time of a game which isn’t going exactly to plan. So, you can only imagine the entertainment should Warnock allow a camera crew into the Emirates changing room for one of his infamous team talks.

Think Warnock hanging a tearful Granit Xhaka on a clothes peg while administering the hairdryer treatment and you get the picture!

If Arsenal get relegated, he’ll bring them straight back up

With top-four hopefuls Manchester United, Tottenham and Arsenal closer to the relegation zone than runaway leaders Liverpool, it’s not beyond the realms of possibility one of these so-called sides could be sucked into a relegation dogfight this season.

But, with Neil Warnock at the helm, Gunners fans needn’t despair! The former Sheffield United boss has presided over a whopping EIGHT promotions during his career, meaning any stint in the Championship would be a brief one.

I think we’d all like to see Héctor Bellerín fix his ponytail on a wet Wednesday night in Barnsley.

Neil Warnock

He values the importance of youth

The Gunners have a proud history of giving youth graduates a shot at the first team, with Pat Rice, Tony Adams and Ashley Cole just a few examples.

Supporters of the North London club can rest assured that Neil Warnock is a man who also values the importance of youth. So much so, that he uses every opportunity to give the next generation some pearls of wisdom.

Take the time he gave advice to a group of sixth-formers at a local school: “I told them I used to smoke in the toilet and blow it out the window when I was 13.”

He doesn’t mind a bit of booing, good news for Gunners fans

Some people crumble at the slightest bit of criticism directed their way but in Neil Warnock, Arsenal fans have a man who actively encourages it! Embracing his unpopularity, the former Queens Park Rangers boss hopes that fans across the country will pay their respects in the correct manner, when he eventually passes away.

“I don’t want silence. I want them all to be chanting ‘Warnock’s a w**ker’ over and over again. For a whole minute. That would be my ideal. They’ll all smile because they’d all know that would mean a lot to me. As daft as it sounds. It matters because it would mean I’ve stirred emotions. I’ve helped people love football.”

Finally, he has no eyebrows

I’m not quite sure how this makes him the ideal candidate for the Arsenal job, but it’s also important to highlight the fact the guy has no eyebrows.

While others have thinned on top, the stresses of football management have deprived Warnock of the strip of hair growing on the ridge above his eye socket.

While the likes of Man City and Chelsea have handsome young managers in their dugouts, Arsenal can take pride in the fact their gaffer looks like a granny who plucks her eyebrows and has just wiped off her make-up before bed.

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