What did we do on transfer deadline day before Twitter? Sit on Teletext praying something would happen, eagerly awaiting the papers for a pic of our team’s marquee signing holding up a tacky inanimate object.
And now, in the days of social media, what do we do? We sit on our phones, or in the basement on our Mum’s computer drinking Monster energy, and stalk our transfer targets.
I’m not talking a couple of checks of their online pages. I’m talking tracking private jets and cross-checking the colour of the leather seats. Looking in the background of Snapchat/Instagram stories to try and spot any landmarks, and even Google translating the tweets of players’ third cousins.
In many ways, it’s absolutely nuts. And in others, it’s beautiful. This transfer window has seen more cash fly around than a teenage boy with his parents’ credit card on a subscription porn site, and with it has brought out a new breed of transfer mentalists.
Step forward, Liverpool fans.
If you haven’t seen it already, the past couple of days have been pure carnage.
There was the signing of Naby Keita – who isn’t actually going to kick a ball for a year – the rumour of a monster bid for Thomas Lemar and the return of the Virgil van Dijk gossip.
It kicked off when a private jet was tracked online, travelling from Bournemouth to Liverpool. A fan and gamer, Dean Coombes, waited patiently with a flask and a box of butties for the arrival. When it came, he snapped a picture and stuck it on his Twitter account.
So the private jet from Bournemouth has just landed at Liverpool Airport and looks like one of the club cars just picked someone up #LFC pic.twitter.com/sgft9jvY1I
— Dean (@DeanCoombes) August 29, 2017
After that, the gates were opened. You’ve never seen so much fuss over a silver Merc van. The same van which supporters believe also picked up Andrew Robertson and Mo Salah earlier in the summer. Or, you know, it could just be a silver van…
Same car that picked up Salah? pic.twitter.com/h0iB8i4jUP
— Coutinho✨ (@bubbIxs) August 29, 2017
The fun was just beginning. Rabid Liverpool fans soon spotted that the jet that had been tracked in the sky was in fact the same one VVD had used earlier in the summer. The shade of beige leather matches up and everything.
Some eagle-eyed fans reckon the plane that's been tracked is the same one VVD was seen looking grumpy on earlier this summer… pic.twitter.com/kRrUJbKWIm
— Empire of the Kop (@empireofthekop) August 29, 2017
The sad, yet impressive detective work done by the Scouse contingent didn’t go unnoticed, though. In fact, in a few hours the famous silver van already had it’s own – hilarious – Twitter account.
Hi @Alex_OxChambo do u want picking up in the morning pal
— KS15YXM (@KS15YXM) August 29, 2017
Don't even ask. You can fucking walk @Phil_Coutinho
— KS15YXM (@KS15YXM) August 29, 2017
Here are some of the best reactions:
LFC Twitter would have found Bin Laden in 15 minutes if he had been linked with Liverpool
— Announce Van Dijk (@GLENJOHNSONPOOL) August 29, 2017
Tell you what, we have some of the best fans in the world. But some of the fucking weirdest as well.
— Kyle (@23KGraves) August 29, 2017
(@MK68i) pic.twitter.com/Dj60hxtQIj
— KS15YXM (@KS15YXM) August 29, 2017
True Detective series 3 should be about Liverpool fans on Twitter trying to work out if Virgil van Dijk is in that people carrier. pic.twitter.com/EtXj4K8sDb
— Paddy Power (@paddypower) August 29, 2017
Liverpool fans trying to track down Virgil Van Dijk #LFC #YNWA pic.twitter.com/YXqiPXtxJb
— The Redmen TV (@TheRedmenTV) August 29, 2017
Current twitter trending topics in Liverpool right now:
-Plane
-Car
-Tracking
-Pilot
-Driver
-Match
-Detective Agencies
-Van Dijk— Robbie ♾ (@KloppsLegion) August 29, 2017
Great work, fellas.
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