For me, I can wake up in the morning and know I’m not going to play well. I know how I’m going to play and what I’m going to do.
Friends of mine will see me on TV, and as soon as they see me walking down to the stage they know if I’m going to play well or if I’m not going to bother.
And it’s not that I’m not bothered. They know if I’m not going to concentrate on it and sometimes I just can’t.
With the issues I have in life, and a lot of people have them, I think it’s more amplified. If I can’t get into a match there’s nothing I can do about it.
I just won’t happen. That’s tough, “Beat me, let’s get on with it so I can get off.”
I don’t care at that point
It’s afterwards I have deep regrets and get really angry with myself. It’s happened a million times and it’ll happen a million more.
I want to keep getting better
I’ve had a lot worse, years, but I think I should be doing what I’ve done this year anyway. I’ve got to remember where I was 12 months ago.
I was dire. And had been for a few years.
So I should be really happy with how I’m doing at the moment, but I’m not. My standard just isn’t where it should be. I can’t keep moaning about it unless I do something.about it.
You can say you want to do this, do that, practice harder, and if you don’t do it, you can’t moan.
I do practice – I need two hours a day. One in the morning and one in the evening, If I do that, I know that makes me a good player.
I can see the effects in my game, I can feel it. When I’m doing that, I can look at a double and pick where I’m going to put it.
Darts shows you the world
You just get to do so much random stuff that you’d never get to do if you weren’t a darts player.
Seeing different places, eating different food – though I still love my curry!
And you meet so many people too. I met Stephen Fry. He’s had a lot of troubles because of his illness but he still gets up there does his thing and tells people to bog off.
I’ve met so many people I’d never have met if I wasn’t a dart player.