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Let me get a pen." 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Imagine the scenes in the bar at Linton Travel Tavern tonight. Off the f**king hook." 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Australia retain the Ashes and keep the famous urn." 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Have spent longer trying to pick something on Netflix. Just like me on Netflix, they've thought 'f*ck it, just go with something we've seen before'." 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"The Prime Minister can't even clean up his own sh*t, never mind mine," said the 15-week-old Jack Russell-cross. "It's time to move on."" 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